Friday, December 31, 2010

Christmas Sauce

The day after Christmas, Sarah's brother-in-law, Mick, and I drove up to Cabela's. He had gotten a gift card for Christmas and I wanted hot sauce and barbecue sauce. I remembered going to Cabela's about a year or two ago and being surprised to find a small cache of unique sauces there. That first time, I had only bought a bottle or two. This time, I was going to buy everything I could get my hands on.


The drive to Cabela's is a treacherous one. As if it were some sort of man-card-challenge to be able to find this outdoor/hunting store, the place is nestled in between a mountain and another mountain. It has a warehouse attached, which just doesn't make sense to me. Seems like one would want to put a distribution center in a centralized location that is easily accessible. This place is neither. It's in Wisconsin.

We got there and were welcomed by the sign that says that you need to check your guns at the door. They do not mean this ironically.

As Mick looked around for something to spend his gift card on, I began to wander. The Cabela's in Prarie Du Chien is enormous, and they have a natural history museum style exhibit of all sorts of game like elk, caribou, and bobcat. To the left of that is the shoes.

I find it amazing to be in a store that is that large and is completely full of things that I don't know what they are and can't imagine ever needing. There is a ton of fishing gear, atv accessories, and gun safes. They also have aisles and aisles of ammunition. I mean, seriously, real live bullets. No one else seemed to think that was weird.

After those aisles of large caliber bullets was a very extensive glass case of knives. Presumably, these were hunting knives. But at least some of them, I suspect, were machetes.

After walking around, I looked for the food section that I had remembered seeing. After about ten minutes of searching, I realized that the place that I was thinking of was not a Cabela's. It was a Bass and Pro Shop that I had gone to a couple summers ago in central Iowa. My fault for confusing the two.

Fortunately, this place did have a sauce and food section. It was in the women's trinkets department. Cabela's has an entire section that you can use to decorate your country home with things like painted wooden ducks and plaid throw pillows. These things are obviously directed at women, and this is where they keep the barbecue sauce, which makes me sigh.

After selecting one hot sauce, I kept looking around until I reached the scary back portion of the store that looked like it was the entrance to the warehouse. There, you can find several sizes of sausage grinders and outdoor turkey friers. They also have some additional barbecue sauces and hot sauces there. It is a clearance aisle. Behind it are the crossbows and GPS devices. I think they just stopped trying to organize things once they expanded into this annex to the store.

I picked up three different kinds of hot sauces and two different kinds of barbecue sauce. I was going to get the Jeff Foxworthy beef jerky as well, but thought better of it. Mick eventually decided to spend his gift card on a pair of gloves. They were $50 and made his hands look like spider man. I am fairly sure that he is going to return them.

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